Pricey Haya,
I’m a twelfth grade pupil and combating some emotional and psychological points, which proceed to influence my tutorial life, particularly my challenges with arithmetic. I had failed the topic earlier and this might be my remaining likelihood to go this yr. After I was within the eleventh grade, I couldn’t attend faculty on account of extreme well being points, together with bodily and psychological, which made it robust for me to depart residence. I’ve these days been experiencing comparable signs.
I used to be earlier taking prescribed treatment which continued by way of my second yr. however throughout this time, I felt that my reminiscence and focus had been impacted. I couldn’t bear in mind no matter I memorised as a part of my tutorial routine. By some means, I managed to clear physics, however failed in maths. A month earlier than my exams, I had stopped taking my treatment, however that interval was immensely tough, as I felt sleepy and exhausted on a regular basis. As a lot as I attempt to management it today, I are likely to really feel annoyed and offended, which additionally causes nervousness and intrusive ideas, making it robust for me to give attention to research.
I attempt to keep constructive and non secular, however really feel caught and emotionally and mentally drained. I have a tendency to match my life with my youthful cousin who’s now in college, whereas I’m caught in faculty. If I fail once more, I’ll lose three essential years of my life.
May you please information me on how I can handle these disturbing emotions, feelings and enhance my motivation and focus?

Pricey pupil,
Thanks for opening up and sharing your question. I hear the despair, helplessness and disappointment in your phrases and it’s a lot to hold. It takes numerous braveness to precise your struggles so truthfully, particularly whenever you’ve been carrying each tutorial stress and emotional misery.
I hear you’ve got been going by way of extended problem, each bodily and mentally and that understandably impacts your power, sense of self, focus and motivation.
First, I wish to normalise what you’re experiencing. When our physique and thoughts have been underneath stress for an prolonged interval — whether or not on account of sickness, treatment results, or emotional pressure — it turns into a lot more durable to pay attention, retain data, and really feel motivated. This doesn’t imply you are not succesful or clever; it merely means your system has been overwhelmed and wishes compassion and regulation earlier than it will possibly carry out optimally once more.
The indicators you’re describing are your physique’s approach of signalling that one thing isn’t fairly proper. If you observed adjustments in your focus and reminiscence whereas on treatment, did you share this together with your physician or determine to cease by yourself? And what had been you initially recognized with? It is essential to know this as a result of immediately stopping treatment can have a robust physiological and emotional influence — and out of your description, it feels like your system would possibly nonetheless be adjusting.
Proper now, I’m listening to experiences of tension, intrusive ideas, and anger — all of which may really feel very distressing however are additionally your physique’s approach of expressing dysregulation and unmet wants.
Let’s check out what you may start engaged on:
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Regulate your nervous system
Your nervous system appears to be in struggle/flight for too lengthy. You have to work on consciously bringing it to a regulated state. This may be executed by way of varied methods, like, breath work, meditation, grounding, spending time in nature, social connections, and prioritising sleep. This can support your physique in feeling protected.
Get bodily energetic
Bodily exercise has a direct influence on our temper, feelings, consideration and focus. I’d advocate some sort of power coaching/resistance exercises.
Create a practical research rhythm
As a substitute of forcing lengthy research hours, attempt finding out in shorter bursts — 25-Half-hour adopted by a 5 minute break. This method (usually known as the Pomodoro technique) will help stop overwhelm and steadily rebuild your focus
Reframe comparability
It’s pure to match your self to your cousin. However bear in mind, your path is exclusive, and also you’ve confronted challenges that required monumental power. You’re not behind — you’re studying endurance and resilience that can serve you far past lecturers.
Search skilled assist
I’d encourage you to seek the advice of a psychiatrist and work alongside a therapist. This mix will help you deal with each the organic and emotional sides of what you’re experiencing, whereas additionally exploring any underlying points which will want therapeutic.
Keep in mind, this one section doesn’t outline your potential or your future. What issues most will not be how rapidly you “catch up”, however how kindly and constantly you assist your personal therapeutic. You’re not behind; you’re rebuilding, and that’s one of many bravest issues an individual can do.
With heat and encouragement,
— Haya

Haya Malik is a psychotherapist, Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) practitioner, company well-being strategist and coach with experience in creating organisational cultures targeted on well-being and elevating consciousness round psychological well being.
Ship her your questions by filling this form or e mail to [email protected]
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